“F*ck You”

Today was moving day.

The first order of business was to empty our storage unit.

Two college-age guys met me at the storage facility. We introduced ourselves, shook hands, grabbed a few moving carts, and piled into the elevator.

On the way up, right in front of me, I saw this scratched into the elevator door:


I pointed to it, laughed, and said to the fine young men on either side of me: “Looks like someone had a bad moving experience.”

The one called Jake responded: “Look! There’s an ‘F U’ as well!”


At that, I declared: “Well, fuck us all then!”

This reminded me of Holden Caufield finding “Fuck yous” written on walls in The Catcher in the Rye. This passage in particular came to mind:

I went down by a different staircase, and I saw another “Fuck you” on the wall. I tried to rub it off with my hand again, but this one was scratched on, with a knife or something. It wouldn’t come off. It’s hopeless, anyway. If you had a million years to do it in, you couldn’t rub out even half the “Fuck you” signs in the world. It’s impossible.

Well, little did I know how prophetic my “Fuck us all” comment was. It took 12 hours to move everything. That included two trips to our new place, about 75 miles of driving.

But I tell you, the fine work of art pictured below was probably an omen that we were about to get fucked hard:


A penis etched into an elevator door takes it up a level. It goes beyond the run-of-the-mill “Fuck you.”

What would Holden Caufield have said?

**ADDENDUM – 2/1/16**

You’ve had a hard day. How about a happy ending? A little something from Jay and Silent Bob will do the trick.

Leave a Reply