As we steadily make progress in organizing and decorating our new home, I have found a few old treasures that have been packed away for years. Among them was this old turd. They say, if you haven’t used something in a number of years, you obviously don’t need it. You should just throw it away. Well, wipe that thought right out of your mind and can it! This BM (beautiful manual¹) of humor should be plopped right where all can see it. So with one smooth movement I took it from the bowels of a musty box to a place of honor, from the anals of forgotten history to a shelf above the throne. I, for one, am relieved that I have done my doodie by not letting this tome go to waste.


1. Deffy, Kate, A Useless Guide to Fake Acronyms; (semicolon) 2020, Fekal Publishing, LLC