THE DRUMMER’S STORY: AN INTRODUCTION

20031221drums

(Originally posted on the website Continuum…)

ONCE UPON A TIME, in a far off and distant lifetime, there was a boy. A drummer boy. His greatest desire was to make music. Rhythm was in his bones and in his blood. It flowed from his hands naturally. It was part of who he was.

As a small boy, the drummer would set his mother’s cooking pots out on the kitchen floor. Banging and clanking, he did what came naturally, unaware and uninfluenced by fame or pride. The drumming was as sure to develop as was his ability to crawl and walk. To some it was only noise. His mother heard differently. Though she sometimes mistakenly called it “tapping” when he “played” the dashboard along with the radio in the car as his talent developed, she was always his support.

The first time he held a pair of drumsticks and played on a real drum, it was obvious to all that it was a fit. For nearly eleven years the banging, clanking and tapping was aimed at this moment. His sticks hit the mark in the center of the snare drum received from his grandparents. His rhythm and the moment were well timed.

His career began in sixth grade. He paid his beginner’s dues through elementary school renditions of “Give my Regards to Broadway” and “Hello Dolly.” His distinction emerged through his solo in “You are my Sunshine,” an eight-measure blur of smoking sixteenth notes and first performance nerves, fired by the crowd’s applause. Fame and pride were on stage. There he stood. A drummer.

His teenage years arrived along with his father in the orange VW Bug, bulging with his very first drum set. It was not the prettiest set. It was not the best sounding set. It was a starter set, a “beater” set. It took a beating well. Together the drummer and his set traversed new grounds of speed and technique. They pioneered uncharted territories of styles and rudiments. They were persistent and dauntless as a steam engine.

With the arrival of his first drum set, the drummer’s talent was confirmed and his ambition was committed. There would be no doubt that this was what he was designed to do and what he loved most to do. His quickly approaching high school days would soon prove it.

TO BE CONTINUED…

Hanging Out with My Bronchitis

(Originally posted on the website Continuum…)

20031220gamefarm

Is there anything of significance to write about today? I am sure that today was a significant and even life changing day for many people in the world. I am sure that people died. People were born. People celebrated birthdays and anniversaries. People made love. People treated each other badly. Things probably went on just like they do every other day.

I, on the other hand, hung out with my bronchitis and didn’t do much of anything today.

I did manage to do a little Christmas shopping, just a few things. When I took my daughter to work, I walked around the store and found a few things for the kids. But I couldn’t take too much of being in such a crowded place. If you don’t feel well to begin with, don’t get yourself into a situation where you are surrounded by rabid last minute Christmas shoppers, half of which look and smell bad. Just don’t do it.

* * * * *

20031220caMelGibson

Meet Gibson. He’s a camel. Get it? CaMEL GIBSON? He is also a puppet. Go ahead, click his picture to see a larger one. I found him while I was shopping today. He has little black camel hooves, hair under his chin, on his tail, on his hump. Yes, he has a hump. You can’t see it too well in the photo though. There are some things that you really shouldn’t put pictures of on the internet. Your hump is one of them.

Gibson is a cool camel. He’s down with all the ladies around the oasis. Ya know what I mean? He’s a hard worker too. Always bustin’ his hump. (Duh.) He’s well edumacated, has a sophisticated fake British accent, and is one hell of a drummer.

* * * * *
During the course of shopping at Best Buy for a gift for someone, somehow I ended up with a System of a Down CD for myself. Tremendous! Love it! Fast. Aggressive. Sounds best at ear splitting volume in the car. You know it’s loud enough when the guy in the car behind you is banging his head in time with your music, even though the windows in your car are all the way up. That’s the way I drove to and from the store today. Then again, that’s the way I drive almost all the time.

* * * * *
I spent the rest of the day reading “Hammer of the Gods” and watching “X2” before falling asleep for a few hours. I don’t know… Halley Berry with white hair? And when she does that frosted eye thing? I don’t know… I liked Halley Berry in the Flintstones movie. She was sexy in a primitive way. The whole white hair, frosted eye thing is a little too fa-reaky for me.

* * * * *
One last thing. The photo at the top of this entry is Rockport Game Farm. I happened to drive by there today. I tried to get closer for a better picture. But the pheasants started running enmasse in the opposite direction. It was quite a ruckus. So I had to settle for this photo taken from the side of the road.

I hit a duck with my car one time at Rockport Game Farm. I didn’t do it on purpose. Sorry.

Posted at 11:30 PM (EST)

Bronchospasmville

(Originally posted on the website Continuum…)

Holiday greetings from Bronchospasmville!

“Hacking away again in Bronchospasmville….”

Ha! I hacked that Jimmy Buffet song and it will never be the same when you here it again! Ha! Hack!

* * * * *
So yeah, yeah, yeah, I got the old bronchitis happening. I still don’t feel too bad. But breathing gets a little difficult once in a while.

* * * * *
I had band practice tonight. Breathing got a little tough in a few of the heavy songs. But I made it through. We may have settled on a name for the band. I can’t tell you what it is yet though. We are going into the studio on Jan. 2 to record several songs for a demo CD. There is a possibility that we will be playing out for the first time in mid-January. I know. I know. I need to fill everyone in on more of the details related to how I got in this band and all. The fact is that I have something written already. But I’m looking for a certain old picture to use with the article. If I don’t find it this weekend I will put the article up without the picture. I promise.

* * * * *
I actually started my Christmas shopping today. I got tiny little 4 inch tall teddy bears for each of my three girls. That’s it. Just three little bears. (Sorry, no Goldilocks in this story.) Maybe I’ll get a few more things this weekend. A candy cane or two. I still have plenty of time to shop! I have at least 5 days. And I only have to work 3 of those days! No problem.

* * * * *
Well… I think that’s about it from Sammy Buffet. Bronchospasmville is closing for the evening. Last call! Belly up to the bar and take a shot of Albuterol. Y’all drive safe and y’all come back now!

Posted at 11:59 PM (EST) (sort of)

Bronchospasms?

(Originally posted on the website Continuum…)

“You have bronchitis and you are experiencing bronchospasms.”

Bronchospasms? What the heck are bronchospasms? Sounds like something that happens to overzealous football fans in Denver.

So there you have the official word from the doctor. I have bronchitis. It’s kind of weird because I actually feel pretty good. No fever. No aches. Nothing but this wheezing in my chest. After a few days of denying that those funky sounds were coming from MY left lung, I finally went to the doctor.

“Yup! You is ill, son!”

I wish every illness felt this good because I really don’t feel bad!

Yet.

As Graceful as a Gorilla

(Originally posted on the website Continuum…)

So, yesterday I got slapped up side the head by a migraine. I suspected one would be coming any day now. I’ve been pushing myself and not getting much rest lately. So I wasn’t surprised when this one came along just after 1 in the afternoon, just after lunch and just before I spit in the face of the girl who sits next to me at work.

What?

What happened was this…

I got a typical migraine that started off with blind spots. No big deal. It’s only half of my field of vision that gets wiped out. I stood up to get my migraine medicine out of my drawer. Big old pretty green and white capsules. The girl who sits next to me at work happened to be standing up in her cube, looked at me over the wall and said, “Man! You look bad!” I said that I just got a migraine, popped a capsule in my mouth and took a big mouthful of Arizona peach iced tea. I second later, while still looking at the girl who sits next to me at work just a few feet away from me, I gagged on the pill and sprayed her in the face with the iced tea. Oops! The look on her face was classic! But I felt like a moron! I couldn’t apologize enough for the rest of the day and all day today.

So now I am the target of tasteless spit remarks at work.

“Hey! You’re the spitting image of…”

“If you don’t do as I, the team leader, say, I’ll spit in your eye.”

“Maybe we need to build the walls of his cube higher or put a plexiglass spit shield all the way around the top of his cube.”

Ha ha. Very funny. No one seems to care that once I nearly died in the office while choking on one of my migraine pills. Go read about it here.

* * * * *
We had a department Christmas party at a nearby firehouse yesterday afternoon. It was a good time. The food was great. The wine was great. The desserts were great. The wine was great. The dancing was great. The wine was great. The dancing got even better because the wine was great.

I was feeling pretty wiped out by the time I got to the party. The girl who sits next to me at work and I had to park about five towns away by the time we got there. Well, it felt like that far away when we walked through the cold air. But we figured that was our punishment for not running at lunch lately. It was good to hang out and talk with some people. Eventually, after the proper amount of wine, I did get out on the dance floor for a little bit. But I was about as graceful as a gorilla with two wooden legs and faulty equilibrium. It was fun to be out there with some of the crazies and to have a certain fine young lady dance around me. “I’m just gonna stand here and look sexy while you dance around me, baby.” Right on.

* * * * *
It is a well known maxim of the ages…

“One’s perception of his own sexiness increases in exponential proportion to one’s intake of alcohol.”

The same can be said of a man’s perception of the women around him invariably in nearly every social setting known to science.

* * * * *
It is another well known maxim of the ages…

“With increased intake of alcohol many ideas suddenly make complete sense.”

However, writing and sending an email to a girl after imbibing wine in a profuse and lengthy fashion may not be the best of ideas. Even if your intentions were sincere and free of all creepiness, she may yet be “freaked out” by the event. (And no, it won’t be due to your slurred typing alone.)

But I wouldn’t know by experience myself…

Posted at 9:00 PM (EST)