I’m watching this movie, “Lovely and Amazing” and two women that I have always thought were absolutely beautiful (Catherine Keener and Emily Mortimer) are being treated like shit by their men. Boy, this is so much like real life. How many beautiful women are with total douche-bag men? I bet 80% of the pretty women I know are in such a situation. Catherine’s husband doesn’t want to have sex with her. Emily’s boyfriend told her that her arms are too flabby. Douche-bags.

But surprise! Surprise! Jake Gyllenhaal saves the day! At least for Catherine. She goes into a one hour photo shop to apply for a job. The kid at the counter turns around and it’s Jake. Freakin’ Donnie Darko, working in a photo shop! Before you know it, Gyllenhaal is banging Catherine in the backseat of his car, s-a-v-i-n-g the d-a-y.

Meanwhile, Catherine’s and Emily’s mom (Brenda Blethyn) is in the hospital with complications from a lyposuction procedure. Lying there in bed, she randomly mumbles to Emily, “I’d give anything to take a shit.”

Talk about taking a shit…

Catherine got arrested for statutory rape. Apparently, Jake wasn’t legal in this movie.

And Emily? Well, she got bit in the face by a stray dog. That seemed random.

Now I think I’ll watch “Being John Malkovich” with the volume off just to see Catherine Keener again…