“Dad, can you send me the CliffNotes version of how you make lentil soup?”

OK. When I first began making lentil soup, I followed the recipe on the lentils package. I’ve modified it and just do it by routine now.

The first thing to do is rinse the lentils. You want to make sure they are clean and also free of hard, dead-looking lentils. I believe there is a note on the package that says there could even be small stones in there. So, you have to rinse them in a colliander and root around in them a little. You don’t want to chip a tooth on a rock while eating soup, unless you’re eating rock soup. Then it’s the risk you have to take.

Put the rinsed lentils in a pot and add water. Whatever the package calls for, I add 2 more cups. I like it a little soupier rather than thicker. Also, the extra water is a lifesaver when you get distracted and forget that you’re cooking soup. Like if you see a bird or squirrel and run off to try to get a good picture of it for your blog. (CLICK HERE to watch what life is like with ADHD.)

I add a whole onion, usually Vidalia. I dice up a few carrots and toss them in. With a garlic press, I crush up two or three cloves of garlic. I like my soup a little heavy on the garlic. That keeps people away from me for a day or two after I eat the soup. I love soup! People? Not so much.

For seasoning, I use one bouillon cube per cup of water minus one. For example (if you’re not good at math), if I put 8 cups of water in the pot, I use 7 bouillon cubes. I add two (more math) bay leaves, some salt and pepper, dried basil, thyme, tarragon, dill, and oregano. I add all these by “feel.”

Bring the concoction to a boil. Then turn the heat down low to simmer. Put a lid on it, but not too tight. Never let your lid get too tight. Your pot will boil over. Simmer for 45 minutes or until the lentils are soft but not completely mushy. If you get distracted, as mentioned above, your lentils will be mushy. That’s okay as long as they don’t burn to the bottom of the pot. If that ends up being the case, you didn’t just get distracted, you probably fell asleep.

There you have it.

I am also PRETTY GOOD AT THIS!