The Arena Can Seem So Small, But the Life Lessons Can Be Pretty Big

This is why we practice meditation – so that we can treat ourselves more compassionately; improve our relationships with friends, family, and community; live lives of greater connection; and, even in the face of challenges, stay in touch with what we really care about so we can act in ways that are consistent with our values.

One of the things I’ve always found so interesting about meditation practice is that the arena can seem so small – just you in a room – but the life lessons, the realizations and understandings that arise from it, can be pretty big.

The process is one of continually trying to greet our experience, whatever it is, with mindfulness, lovingkindness, and compassion; it helps us realize that everything changes constantly and to be okay with that. The effort we make in meditation is a willingness to be open, to come close to what we have avoided, to be patient with ourselves and others, and to let go of our preconceptions, our projections, and our tendency not to live fully.

Meditation practice helps us relinquish old, painful habits; it challenges our assumptions about whether or not we deserve happiness. (We do, it tells us emphatically.) It also ignites a very potent and alive energy in us. With a strong foundation in how to practice meditation, we can begin to live in a way that enables us to respect ourselves, to be calm rather than anxious, and to offer caring attention to others instead of being held back by notions of separation.

Sharon Salzberg in “Real Happiness”

I have barely scratched the surface when it comes to practicing meditation. Sharon Salszberg’s book has helped me tremendously as I’ve given more attention to be diligent at meditating more consistently. The book is full of great advice. It’s tone is positive and encouraging.

I’ve become more serious about meditation recently as a result of accepting the reality that I experience a high level of anxiety. Is “experience” the right word? Or should I say “suffer,” as the Buddhist view would see it? I frequently have unnerving dreams in which I am humiliated in front of people, or ignored by people. I have scary dreams in which I am fleeing from violence or trying to rescue someone else. I sometimes wake up with fingernail scratches across my chest. I wake up in the middle of the night with agonizing anxious thoughts about horrible things happening to people I care about. I grind my teeth and clench my jaw, both at night and through the day as anxiety gets the best of me. I “suffer” from anxiety. (I’ve been helped in seeing this view more clearly by reading Lodro Rinzler’s writing.)

One thing I’ve realized from meditating is that I can objectively view this anxiety and not always be swept away by it. I’ve learned that I can be mindful while experiencing anxious emotions. The anxiety doesn’t have to define me. I don’t have to identify with it and say, “I am a miserably anxious person and my brain is going to be chaotic always.” Recently I awoke with mean anxious thoughts in the middle of the night and had the thought, “Why don’t I meditate right now and look at these thoughts while remembering that they are passing through? These thoughts won’t be here always. They will change.” I was able to focus on my breath and it did not take very long until I felt calm. It’s like one of the lines from the passage above, meditation “helps us realize that everything changes constantly.” Like I said, I’ve barely scratched the surface when it comes to meditation, but that shift in my perspective on anxiety is “pretty big” indeed.

If you are interested in practicing meditation, I highly recommend Sharon Salberg’s book. She goes over the basics. She helped me understand that meditation is quite simple really. She gave me a greater appreciation for the simplicity of focusing on my breath as the best thing that anchors my attention. The book also comes with a CD of several guided meditations. I have a feeling I will be referring back to this book more than once in the future.

Trying to Come Up With a Title for This Was a Real Noosance

There may be no such thing as a free lunch, but sometimes you end up with a free dessert after lunch. This was GOOD!

A young fellow was handing these out on the corner near my office in Philadelphia. I was happy to take one off his hands.

Reclaiming the Land

Here be kale, romaine lettuce, and wildflowers.

Reclaiming the Land

This will be our third summer in our current residence. We have plenty of room for a garden. We’ve had good intentions to plant one. But two years ago we didn’t plan properly and then I tore a tendon in my ankle anyway. We were not up to the task of gardening. Last year we had a baby. There was no time to think about planting anything. So the weeds grew and grew and grew. And I cut them down but never seemed to keep up. This year I am reclaiming the land.

Taming the Wilds

I wish I could say I have fully subdued the land by now. I haven’t made as much progress as I had hoped. But I’m still on track. I need to get several things planted over the next week before I start falling behind the prime planting time.

Here’s what I’ve accomplished so far:

I planted morning glory seeds along our front porch. There are two varieties: Crimson Rambler and Clarke’s Heavenly Blue. Of course, I want to call that Dick Clark’s Heavenly Blue. Most of the seeds sprouted and it looks like they are going to do well.

I planted two yellow rose bushes by our back patio. These are the New Day variety. Or as I think of them, the New Doris Day variety. One bush has lots of new branches and leaves already. But I’m concerned about the other one. No leaves yet.

I planted a raspberry bush. I would hardly call it a “bush” right now. It’s more like a stick. When I took it out of the package, half the stem fell off. But a few inches remained and the roots looked good. Every day I coax it along: “Come on, little stick. You can do it. If you have the faith of a mustard seed you can grow into a giant raspberry bush and fill the whole yard… And then I wouldn’t have to cut the grass anymore and we can cook raspberry pie all day and sell pies to everyone and they would be happy and I would get rich. Come on, little stick!”

I cleared out a corner of our back yard that has been nothing but jungle of weeds previously (see photo above). I hoed and raked and picked out stones. Then I planted kale and romaine lettuce with a row of wildflowers along the fence. Only I ran out of wildflower seed and couldn’t cover the whole length of the fence. I’ll have to get more seeds and remedy that. We’ve had some good rain lately and those seeds have begun to sprout. We will have plenty of greens for our Paleo endeavors.

Enter the Beasts

Lest I give to rosy of a picture, I will tell you that there is trouble in paradise. This trouble is in the form of groundhogs. There is no mention of groundhogs in the Garden of Eden before the fall of Adam and Eve. But I would bet my whole crop of kale that those critters became a thorn in Adam’s side real soon after things went to hell. These beasts love to eat gardens.

Last year I did plant sunflowers. I started them indoors and then planted them outside when they were a few inches tall and the weather was warm enough. The next day every single sunflower plant was eaten. Soon thereafter I saw a groundhog lazily eating weeds in my yard. Damn that beast!

I don’t feel real great about this, but I used a pellet gun to get rid of that groundhog last year. This year there has been no activity around the hole where he was living. However, there’s another hole at the back of our property this year. Again, not feeling real good about it, I put an end to a groundhog out back. I filled in his hole. But two days later another hole was opened near the same spot. So the battle continues and I continue to feel rotten about killing these critters. But I also don’t want my garden eaten.

Plans for the Land

I have two additional sections of the backyard which I intend to prepare for planting. I’m planning on planting corn, green beans, butternut squash, cucumbers, tomatoes, peppers, thyme, oregano, basil, and some flowers. These need to be done within the next several days.

In June I will be planting a good sized section of sunflowers at the back of our property. As well, there is another area near the back where I intend to plant pumpkins. It will be a great pumpkin patch and we will await the arrival of the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown. It will be wonderful.